Am I being helpful or just judgmental? who knows

Image of the Day

Group Critiques

My favorite part of sharing any idea I have is that I both really want to share it and am too nervous to actually share it. But I do like helping other people flesh out their ideas.

For our first round of group critiques, Julia talked about her idea first. I thought it was a solid concept, it's just that her pacing was a bit rushed. A lot of the things I've noticed in the past years' film openings that I've watched is that people generally give you the full plot, when really we should only be giving hints and leaving room to expand sub-plots or add new facets to the main storyline. At least that's my take on it.

Julia's idea had reminded me of that; I felt as though having her main character experience a vision in the first minute of the opening was more on-track for the pacing of like an 8-minute short film, whereas we are presumably making a feature-length film's opening. That's not to say that you can't have a series of cutaways to establish something about your character within the very beginning; Empire does that in the first episode. I just thought it was a lot for her to have that and a rising action, i.e. people being kidnapped, all within two minutes. Hopefully my critiques were helpful.

I also gave some critiques to Baloul; she had an idea where the MC was this woman on the run from her past, and although there were a couple holes in the story here and there, it was a good idea. Her main issue was the actual shots; there was a lot of fluff, namely the "getting ready" sequence. Myself and the other members of the group thought it would be better for her to trim that sequence. 

We moved on to the next person after that, but she had asked me to elaborate more on some of the ideas I had on how to allude to her being watched. In her original plan (keep in mind I am writing this hours later and my memory sucks), the film would open on a man installing security cameras on the woman's house, and then have a lot of angles that looked like security cameras. At one point the woman hears something outside, checks it out through the window, then keeps getting ready but faster.

I felt like she should cut the installation sequence and have it so that after the woman hears the noise it cuts to a high angle shot that implies it's from a security camera. After that, the woman goes into the next room, and it would cut to another high angle from that room. She grabs her stuff quickly, then peeks out the doorframe to see the window one more time, and then just cut to the outside of her house as she leaves.

Instead of the guy installing cameras, I thought that he should just walk by her and say a quick "Howdy, neighbor" (something along those lines) as she goes to her car, and maybe he's got a hat on that has a security company's logo on it. That way she'd have room to establish that guy later in the film (assuming this were an actual film) without giving away the fact that he's watching her.

Again, this was happening as a side conversation while the rest of the group moved on to talk more about their projects, so I didn't really get to say much to anyone else. By the time we got to me, there were only ten or so minutes left of class. I didn't feel like I explained my idea very well, but they were generally positive.

Sidenote

I've been working on a blog post since Monday; I don't think it'll go up until Sunday just because of how much stuff I'm going over in it. There might be some parts where I write a bit of info and then two sentences later be like "I was wrong. Oops." so just know that's because the post was written over the course of the entire week.

I'M CUT OUT FOR THIS SHIT!!!!!!

 I LOVE YOU WADE

I would like to give a MASSIVE thank you to this beautiful man right here. Wademan you are my HERO!!!!!

So as my post from a few hours ago said, I was completely going through it. No plot, no inspiration, just self-loathing. So I sought out on a treacherous quest to find my spark. It was a perilous journey, filled with nook after cranny after rock after hard place.

It was actually just scrolling through a bunch of media blogs from the past couple of years. I started out going one by one, but a lot of them weren't really inspiring; if anything, they convinced me to just cope and half-ass it. So after a bit I just started clicking on the blogs of people I knew; mainly kids who were also in the TV program.

The only one I really knew of from the past couple years was Sam Perez and Tai Cummings' Replica. The sound design, the cinematography, the production design, everything is just so beautifully done.

But tonight I found so many more amazing ones; most notably Ren Moise and Virginia Monasterio's.

I have mixed feelings about the two for personal reasons, but I cannot deny their talent.

The editing in Ren's Hypnagogic is amazing. I love the way she uses color and lighting to represent the psychedelics her character takes. I know I have less to say about this one than the other two, but trust me when I say the editing is enough to put it on par with these other two in my mind.

And Virginia's STEVE has such amazing cinematography and coloring. It really captures the term "in media res". I have no [F-WORD]ing clue what's going on but I would truly love to find out. It also just feels so surreal, which is something I've noticed from all the times I've seen a film or segment of Virginia's.

There is one significant thing I've noticed in all of these openings though; there's a cutoff. There's such a drive of creativity and technique and it all just combines in such an amazingly cohesive color--

And then it dulls. In Replica, there is, at least in my opinion, a noticeable difference in the quality of scenes before and after the title. I am not saying that it is by any means bad, but it feels different. 

The same can be said of the other two. In Hypnagogic Ren does a great job at maintaining that psychedelic vibe, but there just seems to be such a difference before and after he takes the pill. It's mainly just a lack of shot variety.

STEVE suffers from the same thing; after the two characters meet it becomes a shot-reverse-shot-reverse-shot-reverse-shot-reverse-shot-reverse-shot. Even though the acting keeps it entertaining, the lack of shot variety is distinct.

Like I said; there is, in my mind, a cut-off. It feels like each project had some issue with keeping the passion going, though none were particularly hurt by it. Replica had the most shots that just felt alive, Hypnagogic used editing to supplement that, and STEVE used acting to maintain interest throughout the less engaging periods.

And then there's EXTENSION. I was looking at blogs from two years ago, and I clicked on Wade's. I went to the year where he was in AS Level, but when I tried to watch his film opening I saw that the link to it no longer worked. So I texted him.

This opening is Wade. I have absolutely no other way to describe it. Everything about it is so undeniably him; the prevalence of animation and the work conditions animators face to the plot, the accent lighting, the set design, the music--it's just all Wade.

I especially love his use of sound, moreso how he doesn't use it. The silence is tangible in the scene pictured above.

It made me really think about everything I had just watched. They're all such expressionistic examples of the personality of each creator. And I thought back to my own opening, INCANDESCENCE. It's not me. It is, in a literal sense, about me, but I sought to tell it in a way that wasn't authentic to myself.

I love abstract writing. I love puzzles. I love everything.

INCANDESCENCE was a different, yet literal telling of one facet of myself. But I have so much more to say.

And what made me finally realize that was Wade simply asking me:

To which I replied: 

And then gears started to turn. Cogs started to shift and click! into place.

Why can't I do something fantastical? Something surreal? Why can't I take all my previous ideas and throw them out and meld them together and reimagine them entirely?

You may have noticed by now I'm a big fan of asyndetons.

I cannot explain how each piece connected within my mind, but Narnia led to Atonement, and Atonement led to The Stanley Parable, and then everything converged and led straight back to me.

I never really felt like I could translate the vision for the last idea I had, but this I can see so clearly.

First Draft

We open on a word; INCANDESCENCE. A roaring hum fills the universe, as the camera dollies slowly backwards, revealing the space station to which the word is attached. 

"And now I see with eye serene, the very pulse of the machine."

EXTREME LONG SHOT - A black hole dwarfs the station, pulsing and thrumming with energy. It draws the station in, engulfing it in its--

"No, no, no, that's not right."

A hand loudly SWIPES across typewriter. Fingers tap thoughtfully on keys, preparing to compose.

A large lamp curls, looming over a workspace, barren but for a typewriter and its owner.

Their hands freeze, one rising to caress a forehead as they sigh to themself. 

"Ughhhh, Wordsworth..."

Their eye cracks open, staring up at the emptiness. The void begins to tremor.

Everything around them begins shaking, reverberating with unsourced power as voices swirl through space;

"What's next for the young author?" "Let me ask you, is there gonna be a sequel to Iridescent?" "I don't know Jim, I just don't see what all the hype's about" ... ... .. . . . .. ... 

They harmonize into a cacophony of howls and shrieks, endlessly BANG

The author's fist slams down. Their eyes press themselves shut as the voices begin to cease. After what seems like an eternity, their eyes open. 

A fractal glimpse into another reality meets their eye. The black hole yawns before their vision.

They reach out--it's gone.

They cup their face.

"Where are you..."

------

I think it's maybe on the longer side. When I began writing this draft out, I wanted the author to switch to another genre, like fantasy, after saying that's not right, as if they're mulling over different ideas for a story. But that would require a lot more locations to film at than this, which means more people and more schedules and yada yada yada. 

It also just didn't make sense; if I'm writing the crux of a story, in this case the black hole swallowing the station, why would I switch to a completely new genre when I reach writer's block? Presumably I've made significant progress in the story. I would not just scrap weeks or months of work because I'm stumped by the climax.

I'm getting off topic. This is a good starting point. It's a great starting point, even. I will say, my one regret for tonight is that the time I should've spent on my English homework has now been spent on this post. I really hope I get at least a 'C' for this semester in English, otherwise I will be getting my university acceptance rescinded. 

For now, though, I just need to get some [F-WORD]ing sleep.

I'm not cut out for this shit

 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

Actually losing my [F-WORD]ing mind right now. It feels like I keep taking one step forward and two steps back every time I work on this project.

To give a brief update on my last post, I will likely be able to borrow lighting equipment and a camera from a local TV station if I film during spring break, so that's good.

This is the updated timeline. You could argue that this is the most barebones shit I could've possibly whipped up. You'd win that argument.

I don't want to stress myself out trying to rush through Pre-Production. It's the most important part of filmmaking to me. Production, on the other hand, will likely only be one day, and I've tried to keep the crew as minimal as possible. 

I've also got a fair amount of experience when it comes to speeding through production/post-production; I've spent tons of Saturdays these past few months making short films within the span of 8 hours. I'm only acting and doing graphics for those, though.

Yesterday, instead of a short film, I had to make a PSA within 6 hours, which was abhorrent, but I gained some perspective. Being on a three-person team, I had to basically do every role there is on a film set, so I learned my weakest link is definitely production.

(The prompt was "Practice Makes Perfect")

There is only one "cinematic" shot in the PSA, the rest is so-so. I had a specific look in mind, and I was able to replicate it fairly well. I also managed to keep a relatively level head during the shoot, which is a significant improvement given that I've had several breakdowns over video projects in the past.

I'm not going to judge it too harshly because it was planned, shot, and edited all in 6 hours, but I think it's still a fair indicator of my skill as a cinematographer and gaffer. Many of the shots have mediocre lighting, and I didn't use light to my advantage; if I was really thinking about how lighting affects mood, I would've made all of the beginning dark and high contrast, and made sure every shot in the latter half was evenly lit and bright. There was also a whole other thing with framerate that I'm not gonna get into right now, but just know there is serious room to improve on my cinematography skills.

Honestly I think it's just the lighting. I know how to use a camera, I just don't apply technique well enough.

But who cares about technique if I can't figure out an idea.

sigh

I don't think it's super practical to do the train station scene. In hindsight the only reason it was so ingrained in my head was because of that Wong Kar Wai video by Megan Tan. It's not a good idea; the outdoor stations we have in this part of the country are just so lackluster. Let's say I manage to film all my shots without getting chased off by an employee for not having a permit; there's still little shot variety.

I need to really examine the plot of what would be the overall film. I have this half-baked story that feels brittle, like there's no substance to it. It's honestly concerning that I can't make a full-length plot as someone who wants to be a writer.

Maybe it's that I'm trying to stay too grounded in reality, too accurate to my actual life. I grew up reading fantasy books and general fiction; the real world isn't my strong suit.

We need to talk.

I will have to rethink the schedule I posted on Wednesday. Honestly, it's just too impractical. The people I would ask to help me to film will either be A) filming their own film openings or B) competing with me at STN in a couple of weeks.

Competition season is really irritating. I'm gone from the 12th-18th, and right after that is Spring Break (most of which I will be spending in another state). I might have to film during the break, as I'll have a few days where I'll be in Florida. If I go this route, though, I might not be able to secure equipment for filming.

This isn't the biggest issue; I think the main thing I would want to take from either the school's TV checkout or BECON is lighting equipment. I've texted BECON to ask if we can check equipment out during the break, which I highly doubt is allowed, so I'm gonna try and figure out some way to get a cheap lighting setup for shooting outdoors. I have about $190 left over from my final paycheck, about $40 of which is going towards upgrading my tripod.

I already have a phone mount for the tripod, so worst-case scenario I can function with just an iPhone and however much lighting gear $150 can get me. Maybe some tube lights?? Who knows. But regarding the iPhone, I was watching a video earlier about Claudio Miranda's latest shoot, done solely on an iPhone. It got me more invested in the idea, but also this shoot is being done with brand-new iPhone 15 Pro Maxes. I have the 14 Pro, which allegedly has a top-of-the-line camera (some bullshit), but has very choppy framerate at times and can come out kind of grainy. However, there was one thing mentioned in this video that was actually really helpful: Blackmagic.

It lets you customize the hell out of your camera settings, and best of all, it's free. But again, I'm running into the issue of choppy footage. Apple doesn't really make the best products, so I wouldn't be surprised if this is just how my camera's gonna be now, but I'm gonna look into finding a work-around.

They also mentioned in the video how the Tilta wireless focus thingy works with the app to let you customize shit remotely, but after looking at their website it's like $300. 

Hell no.

I'm sure I could find one for much cheaper on eBay, which is where I get most of my gear, but it's not at all necessary and I'd rather get lighting equipment. Actually, I just found an older model for $54 on MPB. Loveeeeee MPB. But again, not really necessary. They do have some lighting equipment but it's still really expensive, I might just have to get creative.

I think extending my pre-production period is fine, so long as I make use of this time. I would like to schedule my shoot before I leave for my first trip, which I think I have enough time for, but I also want to see if I can get a permit to film at a train station (I have an avid fear of the "ask for forgiveness not permission" mentality). I should have a new schedule by my next post, however I don't think I'll make it so deadline-strict this time. I have a lot of things on my plate, so as long as I feel ready by the time I go to film, I'll be happy. I view this project more as an opportunity to enjoy film again more than I view it as an assignment.

i quit my job.

Dear Diary,

I'm exhausted.

What are we doing tonight Brain?

Truth be told, I've been backlogged with schoolwork lately, especially club stuff. Honestly can't wait until I'm replaced by next year's President. Sometimes I get a little free time that I can put towards developing this project, but mostly I'm just trying to keep my head above water. Because of that, I think there's only one way I can get this project done well.

The power of love.

After two-and-a-half years of the tight schedules and deadlines and nuisances of the TV program, I have feel nothing but contempt whenever I even think about being behind a camera. I don't feel joy, I don't feel interest, I only feel stressed. Now, I can find someone else to be my cinematographer, but at the end of the day I have the final say over everything; the quality of its execution is wholly dependent on my patience and performance.

And it's because of this that I feel I need to find some kind of spark. In my experience, ideas usually capture my entire interest for about a day or two before fizzling out entirely. I can't risk burning out on this project, seeing as it's really my only grade for this semester and I need to maintain my grades to keep my college acceptance.

So my only solution is to try and love every step of the way through this process. The ideas I get that I can't translate into words, the stress I feel when I'm unable to bring my imagination into life, and the countless mistakes I will undoubtedly make along the way. I've just got to make myself try and enjoy it or I'll just fail and likely quit visual media for years.

I've Got One Week of Planning and a Hatful of Dreams

That's a mental hurdle I've gotta leap past, though. This is the actual stuff I need to physically do.

I've made a little schedule for the upcoming weeks. The biggest area is Pre-Production; it's also the one I have the least amount of time left in. I think it's feasible, so long as I take advantage of my time in class and start dividing up my English homework to make it more manageable.

The only areas where I can see myself really struggling in the Pre-Production Section are Costume Design and Scheduling.

I can start scheduling on the 24th; I have STN practice pero I think I can multitask in that regard. But if that's the case, then I need to go shopping on the 25th for costume design. I would say I only need two characters' costumes, but I do not know who will be playing the older sibling yet, so I can't purchase anything in their size, ergo I only need the costume for Opal, who will be played by me.

Part of me feels like it's corny to star in your own production, but this is a student film and I like acting anyways, so big whoop.

Beyond that, I have also started location scouting. As mentioned in some previous posts, I had an idea of this being largely filmed at a train station. In my mind's eye, this would be done at an indoor train station, something that doesn't really exist in this part of the state.

At first I was still open to the idea of an outdoor station, but the more I scope out these stations in Google Earth the more I realize they're just kinda ugly. Like there's major roads right by the first location and looked at, and the second one in this picture has a highway right behind where the camera is facing. Not to mention the beige, brick building right beside it.

The more I look at American architecture the more disillusioned I become with this country. Anyways.

One other thing I've been thinking of is fonts for the title INCANDESCENCE. I was originally gonna end it with the -T version but I like the sound of this more. 

Ignoring the title name in this old screenshot, the original font I used was going to be a placeholder, but I still had found it in line with the aesthetic I was going for; the font was just a bit "silly" but also looked uniform. I don't really [F-WORD] with Serif-type fonts--especially not in this case. I want something either Sans Serif Geometric or Monospace. In terms of Weight I'd prefer heavy or bold. And just to be clear, I did not understand these terms two hours ago; this article was pretty useful.

I want the title to be HUGE. It should seem larger-than-life. I might animate it so that the middle letters slowly shrink as the edges grow, just so that it seems like it's "swallowing" the screen.

To Wrap it All Up Like a Chicken Wrap

This is going to be one of the last "yapping" posts I have until March. Until now I've just been spewing out ideas but now I have to actually solidify my plans.

I'm extremely nervous going into this. I don't think I'm that good of a filmmaker, and I don't love it anymore. But all I can do is get my shit together and give it [F-WORD]in' shot.

Cheers.

I can’t wait to Quit my Job

Updates in Story (and life)

A lot has happened over the course of this trip. It’s been very emotional at times and I’ve had to think a lot about my family and my future. Because the source material of this project is literally my life, a lot of where I wanted to go with this story has changed.

Before, the main focus of this story was going to be queerness. However, that feels a bit disingenuous; figuring out my identity was a struggle and affected me and my home life a lot, but it was never the biggest thing on my mind. I think I want it to be a lesser focus, and instead have the family’s relationship with each other take the spotlight. If this were a feature-length film, I’d dedicate more screentime to the other family members, and likely change the structure, but for the sake of this opening there’s really only a few changes. 

Instead of a love interest going with Opal to see their family, it’s their older sibling picking them up from the train station (to go see their family). Also, I still plan on cutting to Incandescent, with the sound in the background being the parents fighting. Again, if this were longer I would change the structure, but for the sake of a two-minute opening I think it’s a solid device that will generate interest.

By the end of this week I will have developed a storyboard and detailed description of the plot, along with a timeline. But the rest of this post will be dedicated to two films I mentioned last time, Brokeback Mountain and Moonlight.

Film Studies

Content

The first thing I want to talk about is the overall story of each piece. Moonlight is about Chiron’s early life, in three different stages. My piece follows a similar structure, dividing the story in two stages, but the main difference is that each point in Chiron’s life is a specific range of time; a couple of days or weeks, after which it skips to about a decade or so later. Mine is kind of all over the place; Incandescent takes place during the “early years”, but that’s so vague. It makes more sense to keep it to one time frame, which will be Opal’s senior year of high school. Iridescent is a period lasting decades, which I’m not completely opposed to, as it juxtaposes the one year quite well, but at this point I want to cut that part completely.

As a matter of fact, as I write this section of the post, I’ve come to disagree with what I wrote earlier, regarding not changing the structure for the opening at all. Firstly, I finally landed on a title; Incandescent. Instead of it being just a piece of the story, it will be the entire story. I don’t feel as though I have enough life experience to write a version of me that doesn’t even exist yet. I will also follow Moonlight’s example of a triadic structure, though the points in time will be much closer.

Back to content, I found that Brokeback Mountain’s isolation of Jack and Ennis in the beginning is an interesting way to bring characters together, and might be something I would try to explore for the first act, but it’s not really something I think I can tie into the plan I already have for the opening. I can isolate Sam when it cuts to him, but using isolation to develop one character is much different than using it to develop a relationship like Jack and Ennis’. I also like how Brokeback takes place over a long period of time, as long-term stories are definitely something I want to explore when I write as an adult. However, for reasons stated in the previous paragraph, that is no longer something I want to do for Incandescent.

Opening

What I found especially interesting between those two films and my ideas was the difference between what each wanted to establish. Brokeback used a series of Wide and Extreme Wide Shots throughout the first two minutes to establish setting. The serene, picturesque mountain range dwarfs Ennis, and it also juxtaposes the loud train that runs by Joe Aguirre’s drab office. It makes Ennis seem almost insignificant. 

On the other hand, Moonlight uses it first two minutes to establish character. Interestingly, it establishes a side character, Juan. Juan is practically Chiron’s father in the movie, and his position is established with one continuous opening shot, following him exiting a car to check in with one of his drug dealers. The camera often winds around the scene’s action (a technique used a lot throughout the film) as Juan seems unbothered by the argument going on in front of him. 

Of the two, Moonlight is more closely related to my own ideas, as I wanted to establish a character with my opening, but it gave me an interesting alternative. Instead of focusing on Opal, I could focus on a supporting character. This had influenced my decision to focus on a love interest in Tuesday’s post, which will now be changed to an older sibling. In terms of cinematography, I don’t find the continuous shot to be very appealing. It’s not very practical for the level of equipment I have access to, and besides that I don’t really like the technique very much. I do like the Extreme Wide Shots, and I think I will use them, but I don’t want to dedicate my entire two minutes to establishing setting. If anything it’ll just be one or two shots.

Takeaways

I’ve found a lot of inspiration in these films. Not just for my opening, but for the overarching story. But now that I’ve decided to shift my focus to include more of Opal’s family, I want to look for films that center around a single character while developing a supporting group. Doing so won’t be of much value to my opening, as I only need to hint towards those themes, but I would like to treat the project as if I were actually filming all of it. 

Highway to Hell (but in this case hell is a town about an hour out of Orlando, Florida)

Plot

Road trip. Finally have time to write. 

The overall premise of my film, now titled either Opal or Lapidary, is about Opal, a genderfluid person, and how their relationship with their family is affected by their queerness. It is told in two time periods, Incandescent and Iridescent. Incandescent takes place in their late -teens, early twenties, and focuses on the mental and emotional struggles they encounter living with their family. At that point in the story, the character would instead be named Sam and go by he/him. Iridescent lasts throughout their adult life, telling the story of their attempts to re-connect with their family and the aftermath. 

Many elements of the plot are inspired by events of my own life, surprise surprise, so you could say it’s a story I’m rather passionate about telling. But for the sake of the film opening, that’s as much of an overall plot as I need developed. Also, pictured above is a screenshot of the notes I've jotted down that I don't want to forget; most of it is incomprehensible to another human being, but just for reference this is an idea I'd like to develop going into university.

Identifying Genre

I was initially planning for the first minute, minute-thirty to be in Iridescent; it was going to be Opal at a train station, getting ready to visit their parents after a few years of no contact. I wanted to open on Opal, extremely close to a bathroom mirror, picking something out of their teeth. I wanted to establish them as weird and eclectic, to show this was a person who embraces the strange part of themself. After they sit down to wait for the train, I would show the title and cut to Incandescent, where Sam lays in bed staring up at nothing, the colors much more muted, as some kind of audio plays off-screen.

I didn’t think it was the strongest opening, but I didn’t exactly see what else I could do with it. So I started looking elsewhere, towards genre.

There are many genres that would fit the topics I would want to explore in a feature-length version of this story, such as romance, coming-of-age, and experimental, but the main ones would be queer and drama.

The two most notable films I know of in those categories are Brokeback Mountain and Moonlight. Of the two, Moonlight seems to be a better source of inspiration for my opening, but that will be explored on a much deeper level in Sunday’s post.

Growing up during this era of Hollywood, I actually see a lot of queer representation (both good and bad), and I’ve noticed that many successful films of the genre use the queer experience to explore an environment. In the coming-of-age film Love, Simon, it’s used to explore high school social dynamics, though I feel the need to point out the level of privilege Simon has in that film. Brokeback Mountain and Moonlight also explore how being gay affects the social environment characters live in, the former being two older men in redneck Wyoming, and the latter being a young Black boy growing up in the hood in Miami.

It seems like such an obvious thing to point out, but keep in mind I’ve been struggling to figure out ways to create engagement in this opening. Now that I realize how important highlighting the character’s social environment is, in Opal’s case their home life, I can develop a more specific depiction of that and hint towards it in those two minutes. 

In terms of marketing, I know from just interacting with queer media that many queer films nowadays are advertised heavily towards teenagers and young adults, but I want to make something that will appeal to a different audience. Since this idea stems from my own life, I want to make something that my family would watch.

This means I have to appeal to a wider audience. I think using color as an intentional means of artistic expression will translate fine across different age groups; most films do so without viewers noticing. However, I do feel as though I should be less “flamboyant” with the queer aspects of it. As much as I hate saying that, I’ve noticed that many people older than my age group find the highly expressive nature of some queer people today to be uncomfortable. If I want to make something that will appeal to a wider audience, I need to make sure that viewers of all generations see Opal as a person, not as a caricature.

Because of that, making the piece a drama, as opposed to a comedy, would help exponentially with making a character that people can connect with on a serious, emotional level. I think I'm better at making comedy films than dramatic, but seeing as I only have two minutes to establish genre, drama's also the more viable route.

Conclusion

My last topic for this post; my concept for a poster. I really like how Moonlight, a movie told in three parts, has a poster that combines all three faces of Chiron into one. I want to divide the poster in half, one representing Incandescent and the other Iridescent. The representation would be done through color, age, and clothing. The left half will be much warmer in hue and show a younger, less stylized Sam. The right will be very colorful, showing an older Opal with makeup, more accessories and more stylish clothes, etc. I want to make it abundantly clear that this sample image is a very rough draft.

Who Needs Order?!

So I've been going at things a little bit out-of-order. I haven't actually had much time to sit down and develop my idea, so I've been watching a bunch of tutorials on editing and filming techniques, as can be seen to the left.

The main thing I've done so far is learning how to add a custom texture in Photoshop; my current idea for a title is Opal, and I wanted to try and add a gemstone texture to that.

The process itself wasn't too hard, it's just about finding the right base image; I first used picture of an actual opal for the texture, but it just doesn't have the look you'd associate with a gemstone, so for the second version seen in this photo, I tried using a cut topaz. I still don't think it's quite what I'm going for, but it's much closer than before. The current font is Mudstone Sans, which is really only a placeholder for what will be the actual font; I want something that isn't rigid, but also looks structured, which is kind of oxymoronic, but hey.

Back to Business (not this business though)

I haven't actually begun writing out a script or rough idea for my film opening, but I do have the idea in my mind, and I will have that all developed by the time of my next post. For now, I have a video project due tomorrow that I need to work on first, so further development of this will have to wait until Thursday. Ciao

Curiosity Kills the Cat (Me)

February 9th. What a beautiful day to be alive. The birds are singing, the trees swaying, and I don't have a shift at work today. Bless.

What I do have, though, is two months of development, production, and editing ahead of me. 

My reaction to this information

The Nitty-Gritty

I would be lying if I said I was completely unprepared for this. Since the beginning of the year I've had ideas brewing for my film opening, but I never had anything substantial. It was more or less just specific shots I wanted to have or ideas I wanted to explore, but by this point in the year only two have stuck around.

The first is a winding shot, beginning about 40 feet up, twisting and diving into the main character, stopping right before it crashes into an explosion of color.

I think I could learn enough about editing to do the color waves, but I don't feel like blowing my paycheck on a camera crane.

The second is not a shot, but rather a title; my film would be named The Wonderful Life of [INSERT CHARACTER NAME] and it would be edgy and quirky and glorious and then The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar came out and I was just sitting there like-

THANK YOU WES ANDERSON THANK YOU BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH

At any rate, the shot was impractical and the title was unoriginal. But I did like the concepts; I want something that uses color as a focal point of the narrative, and I want a title that is artsy. I sat with those ideas in class, working them out in my head as Ms. Stoklosa said a bunch of words that I was not paying attention to. 

I processed. And I processed. And I processed. And I processed those two puzzle pieces I had, and eventually, they snapped together. But you can't make a puzzle with just two pieces; I have to tell you about the rest.

INSTAGRAM REELS, MY BELOVED

As most teenagers my age do, one day, about a week ago, I was on the toilet handling business, mindlessly scrolling through Instagram reels. Funny cat video. heehee

I kept scrolling, as my business was still finishing its quarterly reports, and promotion for a video from an independent filmmaker popped up. "How To Shoot Like Wong Kar Wai" - Megan Tan

I'd never heard of Wong Kar Wai, but I started looking into some of his films and liked the aesthetic. I also looked into some of the cinematographers he frequently worked with, one being Christopher Doyle.

In the video, Tan also uses a Digicam to give an older, retro feeling to her shots. I also liked the aesthetic and wanted to buy a Digicam of my one; the low price is also a really great selling point. There was a whole debacle with me not understanding eBay and trying to rescind my bid on a camera I didn't actually want and yada yada who cares.

One thing the video reminded me of though was The Bear. The coloring of her video uses a lot of greens, something seen in a lot of The Bear's own coloring. It makes the environment seem very eerie, and since I want to keep colors as an aspect of narrative it seemed like something to mentally take note of.

At any rate, I had inspiration for the cinematography style of my piece, but I didn't have an actual piece. At least, not yet.

I just can't catch a break

A couple of months ago I was outed to my parents. It was a really rough time period, and though my parents were generally supportive, there was a lot to be desired. But that's a story for therapy, not blogging.

A few days ago, I was having a conversation with my dad about the whole experience, how I felt about being queer, how I felt about our family, and just a bunch of stuff like that. It was a very emotional conversation and it's something I'll remember until I die. It made me realize how many unprocessed emotions and memories I have revolving around my queerness, and sitting in class I realized that was something I wanted to represent in my film opening.

Idiot Sandwich

Putting all of those together, I finally had some bones to the project. I wanted to heavily use colors for characterization and themes, try different methods of cinematography, and represent my experiences dealing with my identity. I had everything but a name. Something flashy, that would invoke colorful imagery, work as a symbol of the story I wanted to tell, and most importantly, sound good.

oh my god im gonna ************

Pre-Production

I enjoy a lot of this class. I do not enjoy all of this class.

Where do I even start...

Our assigned genre was Heavy Rock. Not just Rock or another subgenre of it, specifically Heavy Rock. Have I ever heard of it? No. But surely Google has.

Huh, that's weird. It's showing me Hard Rock. Well, I'm sure if I Google one of the artists I was given to chose from it'll give more info on Heavy Rock.

Strange. Well, maybe if I just Google one of the other artis-

.    .    .

NU METAL, BIATCHHHHH

The song we ended up choosing was Blind by Korn. Google said Korn was Nu Metal, so we said [F-WORD] it and started researching Nu Metal.

It's a pretty interesting genre, combining many characteristics of other sources of music. One of the bands we looked at, Payable on Death (P.O.D.) derives their name and many of their lyrics from Christian theology, and has been known for reggae influences in their musical style.

I don't want to re-explain our brainstorming process, as I already did so in my previous post, but I'll condense it. We decided on changing the song name to Breakout, styling our actors to be in prison jumpsuits, and naming the group itself The Guys, which originally was meant to be a placeholder for a better name.

Going back to our genre research, a lot of the people in Nu Metal and rock could be described as strange, and so we wanted our band to also be strange, encapsulating that through our music video. 

Production

No jodas

Our "location scouting" boiled down to Mateo saying "I know a place" and us placing blind confidence in him. But there was more to do aside from that; we needed equipment, we needed costumes, and most importantly we needed a day to film. What was really fun about our schedules was that we all had STN practice on Saturday from 7:30AM to 5:00PM, followed by me having a shift at work, and we all also had to film new segments for TV. God ended up moving Heaven and Earth to free up our Sundays, but we still had to get everything else. For added context this was all done on Friday, two days before filming.

We managed to find some random jumpsuit costumes off Amazon, but we had to all order them that day for them to ship in time. Someone should've really emphasized that to Zach.

To recap: We had a location that only one of us knew, 2/3 costumes secured for our music video, and no confirmation on the guitars we wanted to use as props.

Sunday Funday

Practice was practice. Work was work. And then Sunday finally came around. It was time for us all to film our music video at Markham Park. Except Cody. Saturday night he informed us his mom wasn't feeling well and wouldn't be able to take him to film. I don't blame him or his mom in any way; you can't help that stuff. But it did make us improvise our shots, as he was supposed to be our cameraman.

C'est la vie and whatnot.

We headed to our location, which turned out being some dingy shed in the middle of the woods. Thanks Mateo. Speaking of him, we also decided that he should give Zach his jumpsuit, because if anyone was gonna have a different costume it should be the lead. We also decided to draw "PRISONER" really poorly with an arrow pointing up at him; it fits our band's brand pretty well. The shoot itself wasn't terrible; most of our shots had either one or two people in them, so we only needed two or so "full group" shots.

I think the most significant part of our production portion was when two stoners came up to me and Zach to ask if we knew where to find the Shadow Ho-Oh. Glad to see Pokemon Go is still thriving.

Post-Production(-ish)

Adobe? More like...

I hate editing. I think. I'm used to having TV deadlines, which means like a week to plan, shoot, and edit a video, and that's on top of doing work for every other class. Hence, not the biggest fan. Thankfully, we still had a presentation to make, so I had an excuse to stay the [F-WORD] away from Premiere.

I did end up using Photoshop a lot, though. I made the cover photo for our single, which can be seen in my last blog post, and I also made our "website", which consisted of me screenshotting the actual band, Korn, 's website and changing the words around. I felt like it wasn't enough, though, especially since we didn't have many marketing images, like fake social media accounts and whatnot, so I asked Zach to make a teaser for our music video, which I worked into the website. I did end up having to use Premiere, pero we ball am I right.

Mateo ended up doing the editing for our music video, and he did a really good job considering how profoundly mediocre the footage was. I do not have the music video on my computer, but it's in the presentation that will be attached at the end.

Slidesgo? I barely know her!

I feel bad for any team who didn't use some Canva or Slidesgo template for their presentation design. It helped so much.

Making our presentation wasn't all that bad, the biggest hurdle was really just communication. We kept switching around who was doing what and we would yap too much in class to actually get stuff done. After the music video was filmed, though, we really started to hone in on the presentation, and got the majority done a day or two before the submission deadline. We divided it up into us reading three slides each, though I also did a little something something for the first slide.

I handled most of the marketing materials, Zach worked on the teaser video, Cody did the audio script, and Mateo made the music video. We all contributed equally to the presentation itself, so I think by the end we had divided the work up well enough. Fun fact: As I am finishing up this blog post the kid sitting in front of me just reached down into his underpants to scratch his raw asscheeks.

We used to be civilized..

THE GUYS

On my final post of the school year I will actually drop the F-Bomb. Stay tuned.